I thought about their desire to go back to Egypt and wondered if, maybe, when they considered going back, they wanted to return not as slaves, but as conquerors. Maybe what they had in mind with this turning back option (not a few times, based on the Bible record!) was a spectacular intervention God could perform on their behalf, like He so marvelously had in their most recent account. I can imagine them wondering: after all the unbelievable miracles carried out in their favor, why should they now struggle on this path to a place they had never even seen? Couldn’t God make the land of Egypt flow with milk and honey? Sure He could! And if by God’s strength they could conquer the nations ahead in their journey to Canaan, under the same name and power, they could conquer Egypt just as well.
But that was not God’s plan. God’s plan was to take them from a point A – called Egypt, to a point B – called Canaan. And yes, He could have given them any land, except He had some purposes for giving them Canaan instead of any other. (I am not quite sure that Israel understood clearly what these purposes were, or, if they did, I am not sure they agreed with God’s ways of bringing things about.)
But maybe, at least for a while, the location itself was not so much important as they journey. Maybe for a while what really mattered was not which land they inhabited, but that before they settled into their freedom they needed to be on a journey of knowing their God, and - as important, of knowing themselves; for it was through and throughout this journey that their character was revealed first, refined consequently; that their faith was increased, their trust built, bringing about, temporarily, the kind of relationship and collaboration that God desired to have with them (which ensured the partial fulfillment of one of the purposes God lead them to Canaan).
By the time of Jesus’ life on earth, Israel’s failure to understand and/or accept God’s purposes for the longer journey of their history brought them to a point where miracles performed for them, followed by subsequent unfulfilled expectations built a murdering hatred in their hearts.
This is not far from our own stories. We too have expectations. Subtly more often than not, our hearts too long for God’s intervention, whether on our behalf, or an another’s behalf, as we pray and hope for relief, for a better life, for less suffering, for happiness, for justice. And God does have the power to intervene. But He also has the wisdom to not – sometimes. Because
If by some miracles God
Fixed “all the problems” in our world,
Nothing would really change.
For they would all show back
Before one turn of the clock
As hearts lure
Covetous minds
Into councils of
Selfish purposes
Hidden beneath our crusts.
And if by some miracles God
Kept fixing all the problems in our world
He’d really only
Perpetuate sin.
Instead, He promised
To put an end to it.
(Mirage of Miracles)
I think we are also often times stuck in expecting God to work things out on our behalf in ways we deem best. But probably just as often I discover that, knowing me only as an infinite God can, He takes me on journeys that may be, in themselves, more important than a mere geographical location/destination. And/or that the final destination is not merely a concrete place in time, but more so a place of growth, an opportunity for growth: growth in character, growth in trust, in faith, and closeness.
This journey is a process of transformation, in which God brings about time and circumstances necessary in order to know Him. For outside of these, we would fail to grow, or to even recognize our need to grow, to begin with.
God could do much for us in ways we expect Him to, or believe to be best for us. But in His wisdom, He knows that the true “best” is only possible as we put aside our confined expectations, so that He can fulfill His desire of relationship with us, of faith and character growth. Maybe that is also why the Bible says: “Trust in God in all your ways, and lead not on your own understanding.”
Maybe, just maybe, the formation we undergo through the journeys God takes us on is much more necessary than we can foresee, and His purposes higher than we can imagine. And maybe it is only through those journeys that He can get us to be closer in character to holiness, and makes us ready for heaven. For ultimately, this is the true purpose of our pilgrimage on earth: to prepare for the better place that is made ready for us; to know our God, and know ourselves through Him, so that the glory of the divinity can be shown fully in His redemption of our souls.
I hope that the year ahead will be a journey of discovering Him more, and of knowing myself deeper than ever before as the clock ticks away minutes used for growth and for the glory of God, in whom I am learning to put all my trust.
And who knows how close we really are to the final destination of a new beginning….
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